Who’s Missing From the Conversation?
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I participated in Sandbox this week.
I went in expecting challenge—different perspectives, moments where I’d have to slow down, listen carefully, and respond with curiosity instead of reaction.
Instead, my partner and I were mostly on the same page.
She was a teacher, so her comments were more specific. Mine were more general. But there wasn’t much tension. No real moments of confusion or pushback—the kinds of moments where I’ve actually felt myself learning in the past.
And surprisingly… that felt harder.
The conversation stayed surface-level.
Not because it lacked substance, but because it didn’t go anywhere.
When I first encountered these kinds of structured conversations, they felt refreshing—almost exhilarating. I learned a lot. But this time, it felt like I was spinning my wheels.
And I realized—again—something I wasn’t expecting:
I’m less interested in talking about conversation. And this time, even practicing from a distance wasn’t enough.
I’m more interested in being in real, local situations where these conversations are actually happening.
What stayed with me most this week wasn’t my partner’s responses.
It was the wider set of voices.
Sandbox now allows you to “shadow” other participants, so I read through a range of perspectives. What stood out wasn’t just the differences in opinion—but the differences in lived experience.
They were wide. Sometimes extreme.
Some people described systems that were working, even if imperfectly.
Others described situations that felt deeply broken.
There wasn’t much in between.
And it left me wondering:
Are things really this different depending on where you are?
Or are only the strongest voices showing up to participate?
I’ve been hearing the phrase, “both things can be true at once.”
This week, that didn’t feel like a comforting idea.
It felt… destabilizing.
Because if both things are true, then we’re not just disagreeing—we may be starting from entirely different realities.
One point did repeat across multiple voices, though—especially from those inside school systems:
The lack of parental participation.
And when it was present, the difference it made was clear.
So now I find myself asking a different question:
Why aren’t more parents showing up?
Is it time?
Intimidation?
Avoidance?
Disconnection?
Probably all of the above.
From a Civic Roots perspective, I’ve said this before: participation matters.
And I still believe that.
But this week shifted something for me.
I went into this week thinking I needed to practice conversation.
I’m leaving it wondering why more of us aren’t even in the room.
Including myself.
I’m still looking for my way in.
Do you have a way in?
…maybe this is a moment to start looking for your way in too.
Even if you’re not sure what that looks like yet.
https://civicrootsmerch.com/pages/political-conversation